Homestar Runner Wiki Forum

So yeah...thought it might be worth a few good roffleburgers to post any sort of TRUE news story (note that it must be from an earnest news source--not from a parody source like The Onion) that you may find online. And of course, I have just such a news story that spurred me to create this thread. (Oh, and if this thread has already been created...shame on me for not utilizing the search engine better.) So to kick things off:

Boy Screams, Kills Hundreds of Chickens

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The meaning of life is 'bucket.'

FOR PONY!!!

When i saw this thread, that story was the first thing that came to mind. That was hilarious.

I got a couple...
2-Year-Old Dies in Hide-and-Seek game
Metal in a Penny Worth 5 Cents?

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The first 2 in this thread aren't funny. The first one is just weird (and sad when you think of the chicken's owner), and the second one is just tragic. A strange way to die, yes, but not funny.

Well, yes, the first was sad due to the deaths of all those chickens, but still, "Trampled each other to death in fear" - That cracked me up.

It's the one with the 2 year old dying that gets me though. I mean, who would find that funny?

that's not funny.

i hope that kid gets beaten.

What are you talking about??!!! Think of the poor boy! All he did was scream cause he got scared by a dog and he's getting in TROUBLE for it??
China's legal system is just messed up man.

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(THE ABOVE USER HAS BEEN BANNED)

Yeah, that was just sick.

and netzen: The boy was screaming for a long time, it says. it'd be pretty hard to kill 443 chickens.

The second one IS sad, but I think it's just the sheer weirdness of the first that makes it somewhat funny.

Slightly unclear on the concept of "Bigfoot"--wooden Bigfoot statue returned after its theft, without the feet

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You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

i don't know if this counts, but i think it's funny.
i don't have a link, but some guys stole a shipment of GPS units. the police found the shortest route to the robbers.

Church hosts "porn and pancakes" fair.

Yum.

I bet this is going to be blamed on Global Warming, somehow.

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

LOL@ Strong Rad's

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Nah...probably a piece that was accidentally dropped and lost during some plane that was adding something to the atmosphere to control the weather, as the conspiracy goes.

_________________
The meaning of life is 'bucket.'

FOR PONY!!!

I'd go for god if that church were in my town!

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It's more of an anti-porn thing, actually.

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News videos: (you've probably seen these before... someone on the forum had the artist's impression of the leprechaun as his avatar, I think)
Leprechaun found in Mobile, Alabama

Bubb Rubb talks about his whistles

"Could be a crackheeeeead"

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I used that "artist's impression" as my avatar for a while.
You know that had to be a slow news day.

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

Well, it only says a "discussion" So you never know.

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You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

you're right.

let's kill the dog.

Man bites panda.

He wanted to give it a hug, but it bit him, so he bit it back.

Yes, he was drunk.

Mooninites Attack Boston!!

OK, so maybe that wasn't all that funny.

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

ERGH I was going to post that.

Both that, and this version of the article said that the officials are so angry at the Adult Swim People. Like they thought that they did the bomb scare on purpose.

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You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

I find it funny that they had blown up some stupid light-brites.

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When the people who put up the signs were interviewed for why they did it, they said this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zx2ytr2Oyv4

THE LAWL COPTER HAS LANDED

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If I didn't live in Colorado, I might find that a little funnier.

Not that's the wrong way to do it.

In other news that's disturbingly revealing of how flawed we are as a society, People Walk Over Stabbed Woman In Grocery Store.

_________________
The meaning of life is 'bucket.'

FOR PONY!!!