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 Post subject: "The Talk"
PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:44 pm 
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There are a few topics about sex flying around, and this was on my mind today, so might as well.

My dad basically said to me "You probably already know a lot about sex from the kids in school, but just don't get anyone pregnant till you're older or you'll regret it"

If/when I have to give "The Talk" it would probably be basically the same, except maybe I'd give it earlier, depending on how the future turns out.

How did I actually learn about it though? I was made fun of a little for not knowing in fourth or fifth grade (wtf) so one of my friends explained it to me, accompanied by much giggling and a "oh, that's what I thought."

Also, then I learned the basic process in SexEd, and learned the... erm... specifics of what everything looks like from the internet.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:07 pm 
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I learned about sex and everything about it from a book called "What's Happening To My Body? Book For Boys," by Lynda Madaras. There's a corresponding "Book For Girls" by the same author. I did talk to my mother and my grandfather about it, but I don't remember terribly much about those discussions.

Oddly enough, other kids in school played very little part in my knowledge about sex.

- Kef

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:13 pm 
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Everything I know about it comes from health class and the Internet. Mostly the latter.

The kids in school have contributed, but most of that was after I knew what they were talking about, so it doesn't count.

I mean, I knew around kindergarten that the sperm got transferred to the egg. I just didn't know how. I remember asking my mom once. She just shrugged and said, "Er, I don't know."

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:17 pm 
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I think my parents might have mentioned it in passing, but I learned most of the important things (beyond the schoolyard jokes and stuff like that) from an older neighbor kid. He was about 3 years older than me.
I'm not so sure my parents didn't pay him to repeat what his parents told him.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:51 pm 
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I learned about it from a friend who told me between 5th and 6th grades. But even then, I really didn't understand what the big deal was until I was in 9th grade or so. It was then that I started really noticing girls and thinking about sex myself, apart from "locker room" talk.

I like the idea of the kind of books that Kef mentioned, books designed to educate about the natural processes of human sexuality.

I also think parents should openly discuss sexuality with their children, as much as possible free from the embarrassment that our modern culture surrounds it with. While it may be shameful to get someone pregnant or catch an STD, it is not shameful to be an ordinary teenager who is developing in ways that don't quite make sense at the time.

I also think that parents should model whatever sexual attitudes they want to see develop in their children. If you don't want your daughter growing up to be a slut, for example, then it might help if you stayed home with your wife and didn't frequently watch the Playboy channel. Likewise, if you want your son to be a real man who takes responsibility for his actions, then likewise model that responsibility. In other words, be what you want to see your children become. (and before anyone misunderstands me, I believe that the same sexual standards should be for both sons and daughters, not one expectation for boys and a different one for girls - what's wrong for the goose is equally wrong for the gander).

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:54 pm 
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The Snork wrote:
I mean, I knew around kindergarten that the sperm got transferred to the egg. I just didn't know how. I remember asking my mom once. She just shrugged and said, "Er, I don't know."


Same thing with me. My parents eventually gave me the talk in fourth grade, then forgot they gave me the talk, and they gave me the talk in sixth grade. I was finishing their sentences and stuff, and they were like, "How do you know that?!" And I would respond, "Because you already told me."


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:56 pm 
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Do parents even give the standard form of the talk?

CENSOR'D! I never got the Talk, I had to find out on my own and speculation.

COLA, what part of "Only use Hell when referring to the place" don't you understand?

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 12:53 am 
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I learned the general information about the process from my cousin in 3rd grade. I learned about the different parts through...uh...pr0n. And the grosser stuff from 4chan.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:16 am 
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Choc-o-Lardiac Arrest wrote:
Do parents even give the standard form of the talk?

CENSOR'D! I never got the Talk, I had to find out on my own and speculation.

COLA, what part of "Only use Hell when referring to the place" don't you understand?
I said Hell? I thought I typed in heck...Seriously, I must of done it unintentionally, I'm sorry.

Also, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE FREAKIN SIGN YOUR EDITS!!!!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:17 am 
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Heh, I don't think I want to know what you learned from 4chan.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:31 am 
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furrykef wrote:
Heh, I don't think I want to know what you learned from 4chan.


Good idea.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:37 am 
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What's next? College classes in CHARGIN YO LASER? :p


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:41 am 
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Come on, Ian.

...

GB2W.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:51 am 
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My parents basically just said "Here's how it works, don't get anyone pregnant, kthxbai".

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:59 am 
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My parents left a general medical reference book lying within reach, which I read starting when I was like four. So I've pretty much always known the basics of the whole thing. And if I ever asked questions, they never lied about anything, though they were always too embarrassed to really give a full talk. They'd just work in little bits of what they thought was right here and there randomly throughout the years. Sometime in middle school, my dad tried to give the talk and I was just like "yeah, yeah, whatever I know, bye." I didn't learn much from friends. Most of them were goody-two-shoes who knew even less than me anyway.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 4:10 am 
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My parents borrowed a book about sex from the library for me. You know, the kind aimed at ten year olds. Which is how old I was when they did that. Apparently it was mostly because I used to pick my nose, and learning about fetishes would... make it better somehow? I don't know.

Anyway, my reaction was basically "Oh. That makes sense. I wondered about that." Other stuff I learnt in school, then on the internet. Snark sites, mostly.

Hey, 1000th post again.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 4:18 am 
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I asked about it a bunch and my parents pretty much answered all my questions. I think I learned where babies came from when I was...six, I think? Somewhere around there.

Oddly, I was still rather unclear on the whole "base" system until about 8th grade--I knew the basic rules but it still confused me, especially when I had my first kiss (during the summer between 7th and 8th grade) and didn't know if I had gotten to first base or not (I hadn't; there was no tongue). But I'd known pretty much everything about sex by then.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:10 am 
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The Snork wrote:
Everything I know about it comes from health class and the Internet. Mostly the latter.
Me too, except change "latter" to former.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:59 am 
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Well, I'm kind of glad my parents never had any kind of talk with me, as juvenile as it seems I'd be grossed out. The way I learned about sex was through school and the internet. Most of what I learnt in school (during class) was the basic stuff, while out of class, I was taught the more "interesting" methods ("Hey! wanna know what a *Country* *Noun* is?").

From there the internet either confirmed what I already knew, or gave me some weird thing of my own to tell people about.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 2:20 pm 
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Beardo wrote:
"Hey! wanna know what a *Country* *Noun* is?"


A Chelsea Smile is a (place name)(noun), and it has nothing to do with sex whatsoever. :/

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:22 pm 
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Inverse Tiger wrote:
My parents left a general medical reference book lying within reach, which I read starting when I was like four. So I've pretty much always known the basics of the whole thing. And if I ever asked questions, they never lied about anything, though they were always too embarrassed to really give a full talk. They'd just work in little bits of what they thought was right here and there randomly throughout the years. Sometime in middle school, my dad tried to give the talk and I was just like "yeah, yeah, whatever I know, bye." I didn't learn much from friends. Most of them were goody-two-shoes who knew even less than me anyway.
Pretty much the same here. I stumbled upon a children/young adult encyclopedia and there was a page that had nude figures and…diagrams…
And I read the sex pages and that is how I learned the general "How-To".

As fot my parents, they never gave me or my siblings the talk.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:45 pm 
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My parents never gave me the talk.
I learned it all from Internet and books.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:32 pm 
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Magna Carta wrote:
I haven't received the Talk - at the time I should have, I was molested, and my parents thought it would be better if they simply gave words of consolation rather than an explanation of sexual mechanics, which would have given me a literal heart attack. At the time, however, I was aware of physical anatomy of both genders, including genitalia.


Oh, dude, that sucks.

I don't mean to sound bad, but could you tell me the story of what happened? Like PM it. You got me interested.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 1:01 am 
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My parents gave me a book on it in 6th grade.
2 years ago.
When I was twelve.
At least now I get all the jokes that kids were telling. I learned about it later than most kids. Of course I also learned about it from a more respectable source than most kids. The only reason I didn't know about it sooner was because I never rode the bus until 6th grade (that's where all the stuff goes down) and then all the kids didn't want to corrupt me so they whispered/ didn't talk about it around me.

Whatever, I didn't even want to know about it when my parents gave me the book. It made me feel weird after I read it, like I knew things I didn't need to know.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 3:19 pm 
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The day my dad was going to give me "The Talk", he caught me reading The Joy of Sex. He quickly came to the conclusion that he didn't need to give me "The Talk."

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 6:07 pm 
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Beyond the Grave wrote:
The day my dad was going to give me "The Talk", he caught me reading The Joy of Sex. He quickly came to the conclusion that he didn't need to give me "The Talk."


That's our BTG! :-D

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2007 6:32 pm 
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You know what? I have no idea. I seem to have patched it together from a mix of other kids, pop culture and sex-chat adverts in the back of the Daily Mirror, then supplemented that with questionable content* from the internet (we had it installed when I was thirteen). It was only after all that that I had sex-ed in school, which probably helped explain how all this disperate material was to be woven together. One thing I do know is, my parents never talked to me about it



*Mr. Gecko won't be pleased to know that it was furry content right from the start. I believe he doesn't like that side of the fandom very much


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 9:51 am 
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I think around 1st or 2nd grade, my mom read me a book with cartoon elephants and stuff. I vaguely remember already knowing some of the technical stuff at that point because the kids at school would joke about it. But it was comforting to know my mother would tell me the truth, cuz I never quite believed the kids at school. It was NOT comforting to know that that was were I came from. I instantly took on a "they only did it twice" policy.
The book didn't go into much detail besides the basics. I understood some of the mechanics, but it wasn't until almost junior high when I learned how the act is completed and why people like it so much. Not sure how to say this politely, but the book didn't really explain to me the sperm delivery system, but it was too gross to ask my mother a question like that.

When I was about to graduate high school, and getting ready to move to college, we had what I call "The Talk, Part 2." My mom said to me "Be careful of girls at school. They might try to get you to do things you aren't ready for blah blah blah." In my head I was thinking "I hope so."

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 10:02 am 
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Yeah, when I found out, I thought, "that's so... disgusting! I'm never gonna do that!" Of course, it was only a few years before my body did a 180 on that... although, oddly enough, it did a 180 again for completely different reasons a few years later. And now? Well, I have no idea what I feel, really. :P

- Kef

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 1:45 pm 
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I learned how sex worked in 5th grade health class.

My "The Talk" with my parents went like this.

"Now, as far as sex..."
"Yes. I know everything about it and I'm not having it okayokayokay next subject."
"All right."


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