Goofus and Gallant

16_BIT_MARIO1 · **Posted:** Fri Jun 13, 2008 7:20 pm

Goofus burns his tea and boils the water for his study too long. (Yes, I meant that)

Gallant eats his banana flambée properly.

poopskin · **Posted:** Fri Jun 13, 2008 7:26 pm

Goofus flings his banana flambe at highly flammable objects.

Gallant is a honest man.

this-guy · **Posted:** Fri Jun 13, 2008 7:49 pm

Goofus is such a lonely word; he is so untrue.

Gallant doesn't make so many song references.

Stinko_sad · **Posted:** Fri Jun 13, 2008 8:37 pm

Goofus makes too many song references

Gallant does not steal things from his dads closet.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 2:54 pm

Goofus hides a webcam in his dad's closet.

Gallant uses the internet as a knowledge and networking resource.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 3:30 pm

Goofus uses the internet for BEWBS LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

Gallant is quite proficient when it comes to tech support.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 3:53 pm

Goofus cannot empty your browser cache. The CD tray is not a cup holder.

Gallant respectfully disagrees.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 3:56 pm

goofus bursts through the window with a chainsaw.

gallant doesn't try to reanimate the dead.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 4:59 pm

Goofus is t3h n3cr0m4nc3r

Gallant makes a conscientious effort to reduce his impact on the environment, and knows that global warming is just a fad.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:05 pm

Goofus is al gore.

Gallant doesn't kidnap people.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:18 pm

Goofus wants to expand his basement... it's getting crowded down there.

Gallant dutifully reports suspicious activities to the police.

RammsteinRunner · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:21 pm

Goofus is the one who's DOING those suspicious activities.

Gallant isn't afraid to admit he sleeps with a nightlight.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:52 pm

Goofus isn't afraid to admit he sleeps with your mom.

Gallant possesses a rapier wit.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 6:19 pm

Goofus posseses a rape lawsuit.

Gallant changes his clothes every day.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 6:31 pm

Goofus changes his clothes every other week--unless he forgets.

Gallant brushes his teeth thrice daily.

Capt. Ido Nos · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 6:37 pm

Goofus has long since replaced Gallant's toothbrush with the toilet scrubber.

Gallant does for a walk in the sun. With sunscreen, of course.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 7:17 pm

Goofus also goes for a walk in the sun...Stark nekkid.

Gallant visits the doctor regularly.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 7:33 pm

Goofus poses as a gynaecologist.

Gallant purchases feminine products for his wife without complaining.

poopskin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:07 pm

Goofus takes feminine products while they're...Err..."In Use".

Gallant wears a leather jacket and saves the ladies from certain death with his motorbike.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:12 pm

Goofus wears the faces of his victims as Halloween masks.

Gallant drives a SMART car for better gas mileage.

16_BIT_MARIO1 · **Posted:** Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:36 pm

Goofus runs over those with a fuel-sucking monster truck.

Gallant does not steal the food of other people.
(Sorry I had to phrase that weird, but my apostrophe key is broken, and I can not copy and paste for some reason. Just imagine I did it normally)

this-guy · **Posted:** Tue Jun 17, 2008 8:49 am

Goofus eats the faeces of other people.
(Sorry for the disgustingness, but I couldn't think of anything else.)

Gallant will be the roundabout.
Bonus Gallant's name is spelled correctly.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Tue Jun 17, 2008 1:51 pm

Gufus is all over that crap.

Gallant never janks when he can jive.

TheHumanScreenshot · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 5:21 am

Goofus doesn't even know what that means.

Which means I'm like Goofus. :rolleyes:

Gallant does not punch people that aren't familiar with Internet memes.

just a username · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 5:32 am

Goofus sends hate mail to web comic artists for not referencing 9000, Sparta or Potato Chips.

Gallant drives his friends home after a party as he was the only one who didn't drink.

TheHumanScreenshot · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 7:29 am

Goofus drives his friends off a bridge after a party as he was the only one who did drink.

Gallant plays the Hallrunner forum game correctly by not using commands like "LEEROY JENKINS". Bad High Skool Artist! Bad!

16_BIT_MARIO1 · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:17 am

Goofus shoots signs that say "PLEASE TO BE [something about using verbs, not nouns]" every time you show up.

Gallant doesn't overuse internet references.

this-guy · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:18 am

Goofus plays the Hallrunner forum game incorrectly by using commands like "IT'S OVER 9000".

Gallant can start to make it better.

it's a lion! · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:48 pm

Goofus can finish ruining it.

Gallant starts discussion threads on relevant topics.

TheHumanScreenshot · **Posted:** Wed Jun 18, 2008 8:01 pm

Goofus hacks into a modmin's account and bans Gallant.

Gallant doesn't procrastinate updating his webcomic.

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Goofus and Gallant

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