Homestar Runner Wiki Forum

You do your best, but then realise he's like, 20 miles away.

>Learn C++, then program something cool.

In your case, it's more like F--, and the coolest thing you were able to program was a little flashing colored text. At least Homsar was impressed, but no one else was.

Type: Mix the Too Hot Porridge with the Too Cold Porridge.

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You get Just Right Porridge and more than you would get if you just eat baby bear's! PORRIDGE FTW!!1

>Complicatize

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You come up with a plan to get rid of Trogdor that is so elaborate, it's bound to work. It takes you 3 years of drawing blueprints and 15 years of construction. Unfortunately, you put so much energy into creating your fiendish plot, you forget what your ultimate goal is. Instead, the gigantic humongousoid anvil ends up falling on your head instead of Trogdor's. ANVIL BACKFIRE'D!!

Type: Tell Kerrek that you want help with your alcohol problem.

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He understands. He goes to AA meetings, and gets his problem under control. Then he kills you. Maybe you should have mentioned anger management...

Watch pie doing a dance.

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The pie does a cute little dance. Then you eat the pie. Constitutioon +1, Luck -2 permanently.

Type: Give Habanero to Old Man.

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Old Man takes Habanero, places it on his head, and starts dancing. Congratulations. You found his crazy fetish. You die from life completion. You dead.

Mango hospital.

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You better believe it.

The take the mango to the hospital. The doctors put the little thingies on it and yell, "Clear!" a couple of times, but to no avail. It was just the poor mango's time. Poor mangie! *sniff!* Alas, we hardly knew ye!

Type: Drink Nuke Juice.

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Ooh. I glow in the dark.


Command: Watch the The Wizard of Oz with The Wicked Witch of the West.

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You get a sudden urge to play Dark Side of the Moon. PINK FLOYD'D!!

Type: Give coconut bikini to Ramrod.

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No no no no no no no no no no no. I like my eyes to work thank you very much.


Command: Steal IJ's Admin powers

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That's kind of hard, seeing as how he doesn't have them anymore. You get nothing for your efforts, except getting chopped in half by a plastic lightsaber.

Type: Yo quiro Taco Bell!

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That's sooooo old, man. You computer implodes for some reason.

Command: Use crowbar on tree.

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

A tree lover kicks you in the grill. Several times. Using the crowbar.

Command: DELETED!

You delorted every post before yours...

Command: Revive this dang thread with Hilary Duff music!

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That would kill this thread.


Command: Win the WWE Title in a Hell in the Cell match.

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Steve Young tackles you with two seconds left. You dead.

State whether Hilary Duff is actually any good or not.

(Clan, I sure as heck don't like her.)

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You better believe it.

Every time someone makes fun of Clan, they forget to make a command (just like him!)

Give his TROGDAY! present.

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He take the present, doesn;t like it and burninates you for it.


Command: Not.......Pigeons

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They eat bread crumbs.

(Oh, and the stating thing was my command.)

20X6 you good.

(1100! I WIN AT LIFE!)

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You better believe it.

Uhhhh... yeah...

Defeat the Empire.

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You defeat the empire. Unfortunately, the knights that keep Troggie at bay are gone now. EVERYTHING is burninated. You dead and everyone hates you. Good Job.

Command: Slam door

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

You slam the door. In retaliation, the Baby Lady clobbers you with a genuine Lodge brand cast iron skillet. SKILLET NAP'D!!

Type: Give Cowbell of Clank +2 to Christopher Walken.

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You give it to him, but he needs more. He will always need more.

Grow a ZZ Top-style beard.

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Not sure of which member to imitate, you decide to grow a beard like Frank Beard.
Good choice. You don't have to grow a beard.
Why is it that the only dude in the band with the name Beard doesn't have a beard?!?!?

Command: let things get out of hand

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

(It's called "irony!")

It all gets out of hand. Really badly out of hand. Christopher Walken clunks you over the head with his Cowbell. That'll learn ya!

Type: I'm Bond James Bond.

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Pussy Galore


Command: Drop the bombshell.

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You 'splode.

Command: Eat a chocolate cake.

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Your Bomb A Splode! (Oh, come on! Like you didn't see that coming!)

SIMULPOST'D!!

You eat the cake. Your Heart A Splode! (from all the fat, sugar, and cholesterol).

Type: Give Christopher Walken's Cowbell to Eh, Steve! and watch him run like the wind!

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Cue the wheelchair, only with Christoper Walken's voice.
I'll get you, Eh Steve! if it's the last thing I dooo..
Only, instead of running, he walks all menacingly toward Eh Steve with a soldering iron.

Command: Use Eddie Murphy on Trogdor

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If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.