STUPID COMMAND II: The Death Factor!

topofsm · **Posted:** Wed Jun 07, 2006 5:27 pm

The kerrek is a bit cheesed off, but he accepts. The kerrek starts pounding his fist around, but Pit comes by. Pit shoots him. Stinkoman challenges pit. Pit shoots stinkoman. Then he shoots you.

> Work out

StrongRad · **Posted:** Thu Jun 08, 2006 2:22 am

You work out in the Peasantry Gym. You feel like you can take on the world. Unfortunately, being able to benchpress a car doesn't help you when you're being burninated. Remember, you're against a Burninator, not a Put-A-Car-On=Top-Of-You-inator..

Command: Stare into the sun

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz · **Posted:** Thu Jun 08, 2006 9:13 pm

you go blind, there's no way you can win now. GAME OVER

eat chicken soup with an dumpling

HHFOV · **Posted:** Thu Jun 08, 2006 11:01 pm

whoops the dumpling had a tapeworm that consumes you in an agonizing death.

ride into battle with excalibur atop a unicorn

AceDecade · **Joined:** Wed May 10, 2006 5:14 pm **Posts:** 166

You ride into a fierce battle , but the time it takes to acquire excalibur means you are now in the year 9,002,655. Laser Demons with horns and nuclear bomb robot dogs and some robot birds who have duns that shoot light sabers and a pirate with a crew of pirates who launch burning sharks at you. You're dead.

Shoot the cows in Old Man Jenkins' yard

Didymus · **Posted:** Fri Jun 09, 2006 2:48 am

You shoot the cows in Leeeerooooy Jeeeeenkiiiiins yard. Space Tree is not pleased. He shows up and does tree-type stuff to you (to make sense of that, you will want to watch Anti-Cartoon'd).

Type: Pour Clan into Jello and mix thoroughly.

StrongRad · **Posted:** Sun Jun 11, 2006 7:49 am

You mix the Ku Klux Klan into Jello. Out comes a white supremacist Bill Cosby. Strange..

Command: Throw case Cabo Wabo over cliff and watch Didymus jump over after it.

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 12:34 am

you do, and you laugh and laugh and laugh. +1 point

read the funniest joke ever

Didymus · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 12:40 am

It was the Joke used by the British to stop the German armies in WWII. You die laughing. DEAD'D!!

Type: Trick Jhonka into smooching Kerrek.

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 12:53 am

you set them up on a blind date, and I mean, they were actually not able to see during the date. The date goes very well, until they kiss then take off their blindfolds to see each other. They team up on you and kill you.

i has the bes gramer in the worlds

Didymus · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 1:03 am

Spiderman beats the everloving crap out of you for being a total moron.

Type: Eat ribs.

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 1:09 am

you eat the first rib. It is the best thing you have ever tasted. You have to eat more, and more and more. You can't stop eating, and you keep eating until you explode.

Black Bart

Jman4ever · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 1:33 am

Response: We would like to say funny here, but we are not sure which Black Bart you are referring to so you die for no reason.

Command: Get run over by a lawnmower blade

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 1:39 am

Jman4ever wrote:

Response: We would like to say funny here, but we are not sure which Black Bart you are referring to.

Command: Get run over by a lawnmower blade

we were referring to to the main charachter in blazing saddles

toastpaint

Jman4ever · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 1:58 am

DarkSideOfTheSchwartz wrote:

Jman4ever wrote:

Response: We would like to say funny here, but we are not sure which Black Bart you are referring to.

Command: Get run over by a lawnmower blade

we were referring to to the main charachter in blazing saddles

toastpaint

Real Reponse: Black Bart and the rest of the Blazing saddles cast take turns running over you with horses while making racist jokes.

Command: Get run over by a lawnmower blade

StrongRad · **Posted:** Mon Jun 12, 2006 6:48 am

Why would I do that? Do you have any clue how bad that would hurt? Do you really hate me that much, or do you just suck at this game? If it's the former, turn the game off and go outside. If it's the latter, buy THE OFFICIAL Stupid Command: The Death Game Strategy Guide and Walkthrough by That Guy That Writes All Of The Video Game Books; Available at finer fireworks stand/liquor store/gas station combo buildings throughout the south.

Command: Find out where the bread goes.

Beyond the Grave · **Posted:** Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:00 am

Bread goes to IJ, he is a carb loader.

Command: Give baby to Didydor.

Didymus · **Posted:** Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:07 am

Didydor takes ye baby and raises him as his very own. He teaches him the fine arts of PWN'ing, THWACKY'ing, and...um...Rachael Ray'ing? When the Baby gets big and strong, he sets out on a quest to carry on your legacy. It's a good thing, too, because we all know what happens to you at the end of this game. Unless ye get ye flask, but what are the odds of that happening?

Type: Give Ramrod's Blue Dress of Jibbly Jibbly to Naked Ned.

topofsm · **Posted:** Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:10 am

Naked Ned's jaw drops. You just unclothed ramrod. Naked ned is disghusted enough to die. Good job, you killed one of Peasant's Quest's greatest characters.

>Glue Ramrod's dress to him.

Didymus · **Posted:** Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:27 am

Oh, great! Now he'll NEVER wear trousers again!

Type: Give Mechanical Trousers to Naked Ned.

??? · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:06 am

Ned: They're the WRONG TROUSERS!

C/: run "C:/PROGRA~1/CLAN_RHRN_SIMULATOR.EXE"

Didymus · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:14 am

Your compy gets invaded by Jinzo, Hilary Duff, Organization XIII, and a whole bunch of Chaos Emeralds. Now you're really screwed.

Type: Drop a train on 'im, Jello B!

??? · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:32 am

Jello B drops a train. Unfortunately, you didn't say whom, just that they were male, so Jello B goes back in time and crushes Jello A with a train. Without A there is no B. Without B, A wouldn't be crushed. PARADOX'D!

Code:

{
If(Buried_alive)
{
Then
Yell("KHAAAAAAN!")
Echo(Line_6)
}
{
Else
Board("Enterprise")
}
}

Didymus · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 7:18 am

Combolations! You...manage to...turn...the game...into...Bill...Shatner! Now...all the...characters...talk...like this!

Type: Conces5ion Stand!!

StrongRad · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 2:50 pm

w00t! teh h07d06z with mu574rD and 0ni0nz!

Command: Make a box

HHFOV · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 3:00 pm

The box grabs the excalibur and stabs you through the face. Blood fountains from your head and it seems as if it will never stop. The whole world is flooded with your major organs and carnage, but right as the last innocent baby is about to suffer an agonizingly slow and painful death by blood drowning, Hitler comes out of hiding, one hundred and ten years old, and launches a nuclear holocaust at the rest of the world.

Command: Take a poo-poo.

StrongRad · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 3:32 pm

This brings up a really important question. Why do they say you're taking it when you're really leaving it. I mean, nobody actually takes it with them!

Command: Use Ed's Hamster with Microwave

Didymus · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 3:50 pm

"Mr. Bun-Buns!!" he shouts. Double D tries to console him, while Eddy tries to sell him off as some kind of hamburger to that weird foreign kid. That one guy with the piece of wood for a best friend ends up clobbering you with it.

Type: NO SOUP FOR YOU!!

StrongRad · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 3:57 pm

Ok, then.. I've got all your recipies.. Now, everyone else will too, if you don't give me some freakin' soup! What's that? Still no soup? NO BUSINESS FOR YOU!

Command: Tie your shoes

Didymus · **Posted:** Wed Jun 14, 2006 4:00 pm

You tie my shoes. Thanks. Now we're Bestest Best Buddies.

Type: Pooooooossssssuuuuums!!

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STUPID COMMAND II: The Death Factor!

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