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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:04 am 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Ok, but you get burned so bad that your head exploads. Then someone ruins it again.

I wish that all my dreams would come true.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:11 am 
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Location: In my house with my two kids, Bulldozer and topofsm.
Granted! All your dreams come true! And so do all your nightmares.

I wish it was summer.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:13 am 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted. It's summer. Forever. The world goes into an endless drought and everyone dies. Happy now?

I wish I had a star named after me.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:23 am 
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Location: In your garbage, having a look for any incriminating evidence.
Granted: you get a star named after you, but it doesnt like its new name and turns into a black hole and swallows the universe.

I wish for an old 1930's radio.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:33 am 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Congratulations, you get a 1930's radio, but the only station it can pick up is the "Strong Sad Whines" station. And when he's off-air, it's full-time chanting. And the power button breaks after you start it, and the plug melts into the electrical socket, so you can't unplug it. It also has a decades-old Wicca spell put on it that makes it impervious to destruction.

I wish I was a world-famous and extremely talented musician.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:55 am 
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Location: Blowing my brains out through my nose
Granted! You are Michael Jackson.

I wish that I had the best party ever at my house.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 4:01 am 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
[Still twitching and writhing in mental anguish from the thought of being Michael Jackson...]

Granted. Now you can clean it up alone.

I wish for a yellow submarine.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:09 pm 
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Location: Bunker in Stu's Backyard
Granted. You now live in a yellow submarine with the Beatles, and they play that particular song every 10 minutes.

I wish I could FLLLYYYY!!!


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 3:14 pm 
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Location: in the white house, using wi-fi
ok but now you have to live with birds and eat worms!

i wias that my life was exactly like sora's

kingdom hearts

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 5:02 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
OK, but you're controlled by a horrible player. You lose/die every five minutes or so.

(I've never played Kingdom Hearts, since I don't have a PS2 - or even a PSX - so I don't know what happens when you screw up.)

I wish my life was super great all the time.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 8:25 pm 
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Location: The Desert of Cyberland
Granted. After a day of winning the lottery, getting a new puppy, having the significant other of your dreams fall for you, becoming famous and ruling the world, a heavy lourde falls on you. Life was good while it lasted, eh?

I wish I knew how to break dance.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 8:28 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted: You break dance, but in the wrong way. Every bone in your body is broken, and you have a huge bill to replace the antiques.

I wish I could make a wish.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2006 8:43 pm 
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Location: Blowing my brains out through my nose
Granted! You can now make a wish about being dead.

I wish that I could bargain easily with people in Mexico.

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PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2006 2:35 pm 
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Location: A white, cushioned room where I am all alone...
You bargain easily with the Mexicans. In return for giving you a dollar, they are allowed to come in illegally all they want.
I wish I could think of even better jokes.
Go humility!

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PostPosted: Tue May 02, 2006 8:41 am 
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Location: In your garbage, having a look for any incriminating evidence.
Granted: but you think of a joke so good, the universe SPLODES.

I wish for some Cable cutters to cut the power at the back of that freakin' radio.

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PostPosted: Tue May 02, 2006 9:20 am 
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Location: Trapped in a van outside of New York.
Granted. All of the radio waves have to pack up and find a new home. They choose, YOUR INNER EAR! (muahahahahaha!)

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2006 6:34 pm 
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Location: Hey! I'm looking for some kind of trangly thing!
You wished for...nothing! *BLING!* You cease to exist. And your evil sister gets all your stuff, and uses it to take over the world.

I wish that alien with the Eludium Pew 36 Explosive Space Modulator would blow up the Dark Lord Williamus Gatus.

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2006 7:28 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted. Williamus Gatus was blown up when he came for a surprise marketing visit to your parents' house. (He felt he didn't have enough money, so he came petitioning for your family's support. He visited 358,275 homes before theirs.) Unfortunately, it not only destroyed the Dark Lord and your house, but it destroyed your whole hometown. You weren't there when it happened. Now everyone you love is dead and you have to live with that. Happy now?

I wish American citizens would finally start looking at the good side of things instead of always focusing on what's going wrong.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 1:58 am 
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Location: My shell.
Granted. Then they become so optomistic, that they drive you crazy. You end up shooting yourself. ("Oh well, it'll decrease the surplus population!")

I wish Homestar would pronounce his "r's".


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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 5:35 am 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
(Lovely Scrooge reference. I enjoyed that.)

Granted. Homestar pronounces his r's. He also grows arms and starts wearing pants, and his skin becomes normal. Strong Bad then takes off his mask and boxing gloves, puts on a shirt, and gets a new computer with Mac OS X. Strong Sad loses weight and gets some anti-depressants, while Marzipan suddenly gets a human body, instead of a broom. The Poopsmith quits and permanently gives up his vow of silence. You get the idea.

The location of Free Country USA is suddenly made known to the public, and everyone there is now normal. H*R is no longer funny, so it fades out of existence, taking HRWiki and the HRWiki Forum along with it. Congratulation. You just ruined the whole world.

I wish I didn't have to take Gen Eds.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:00 pm 
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Location: Bagged milk land.
Granted! Because people in fatal squirrel juggling accidents don't have to do much of anything!

I wish I wasn't too lazy to walk across the hall and go to the bathroom.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:03 pm 
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Location: In my house with my two kids, Bulldozer and topofsm.
You aren't. Unfortunately, you are too lazy to walk back from the bathroom. So you're stuck on the toilet forever.

I wish I didn't have poison ivy.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:05 pm 
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Location: Hey! I'm looking for some kind of trangly thing!
*BLING!* Your poison ivy goes away. But now you just have plain old poison. DEAD'D!!

I wish that insurance gecko was a super soldier who fought against the evil forces of terrorism.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:09 pm 
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Location: Bagged milk land.
Granted, but his family tracks you down and beats you up for making their most valued family member leave them. WHO'S GONNA READ TO MINDY NOW, HUH?! AND WHAT ABOUT POOR GRANDMA HICKENS? WHO'S GOING TO GET HER GROCERIES AFTER HER OPERATION?!

I wish my teeth didn't feel so plaquey.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:14 pm 
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Location: In my house with my two kids, Bulldozer and topofsm.
Your teeth don't feel anything now....because they have all fallen out! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!

I wish the mode button on my watch wasn't broken.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:18 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted. The mode button is fixed, but everything else breaks. There are no digits, the face is cracked, all of the LED's have stopped functioning, and all the other buttons fell off - but hey! You can press the mode button!

I wish that I could wish for something that no one could turn around.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:18 pm 
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Location: Hey! I'm looking for some kind of trangly thing!
*BLING!* the button is fixed. But unfortunately, the watch itself is now broken. Shoulda got a Timex!

I wish that puppies would materialize out of mid air whenever I felt down.

SIMULPOST'D! The next djinni answer mine and Bull's.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:23 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted. But they're all German Shephards with sharp teeth and rabies.

I wish that I could win a first-class one-way trip to a magical far-away place, where the air smelled like warm root beer and the towels were oh so FLUFFY!

EDIT: And this one too, I guess... (Maybe next time I shouldn't respond to a simulpost...)

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 9:27 pm 
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Location: Hey! I'm looking for some kind of trangly thing!
You get a one-way trip to a magical land called "Spilled Root Beer Land," where there's root beer spilled all over the place, and the towels are used to sop it up.

I wish I didn't have to go back to my office today.

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PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2006 3:57 pm 
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Location: At home with my mom, Shopiom, and my sister, topofsm, remotely leading my army of Death Penguins.
Granted. A heavy lourde falls on you. Now you don't have to go anywhere, 'cuz you're dead.

I that nobody would ever get angry again.

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