Homestar Runner Wiki Forum

Wish Granted. But they never leave. And they're five year olds!
EDIT: SIMULPOST'D!!!:Your an awesome RUBBER band. You spend life being put around newspapers. Then you snap. YOur dead. The end.


I wish I owned Mancinos or Quiznos or Subway or some other sandwich place.

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Granted. But under your leadership, they go Bankrupt!


I wish I could Fly.

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Wish granted. you get swatted.

I wish i could fence.

Granted. But you get your pants caught on the barbed wire.

I wish i had gills.

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Wish granted. your mom calls you in for dinner, and you drown.. in air.

I wish i was immortal.

Granted, but you still age. You'll be a dusty bag of skin and bones for the rest of eternity.

I wish I could talk to fish.

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(what is with you and water?) Wish granted. They tell you to go and hang yourself, and you take their advice.

I wish a had a ferarri.

(nothing, I just cant think of many good wishes right now, and I keep looking at my fish tank)

Granted, but it'll explode if it goes over 25 MPH.

I wish I hada castle.

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Wish granted! You wake up one morning only to find that you are the King of Town. And that nobody likes you.

I wish for five fish. Five fish on a dish!

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So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell, blue skies from pain. Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil? Do you think you can tell?

Granted, but they're great white sharks.

And they're still alive.

And they're hungry.

And they're on stilts.


I wish I wasn't the King of Town anymore.

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Wish Not granted!
I wish Wishing for more wishes wasn't against the rules!!

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Alright! You win, The Noid! No more memes.

Wishing that wishing for more wishes to be not against the rules is also against the rules. Stop trying to break reality.

I wish my sister would stop stealing my breads. D:

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get LOST

Granted: She starts stealing the rest of your foodstuffs instead.

I wish I had a lifetime supply of popcorn seeds.

BLING!! You get a lifetime supply of popcorn seeds. Unfortunately, they all pop because of the intense summer heat and cause the entire Southeast to be flooded with popcorn. Some redneck guy gathers an angry mob and comes to your house with a pitchfork, saying, "It's that dang ol' metal guy's fault! Let's Git 'Im!!" REDNECK ANGRY MOB'D!!

I wish pork chops grew on trees.

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Granted, but the Porkchop trees eat whoever tries to pick the porkchops from its branches and uses the protein to grow more porkchops.
Thats not pork you're eating...

I wish for a mamillion Dollars.

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You get some mammalian dollars. They're only legal tender with rabbits and other furry mammals. You lose.

I wish I was a Sith lord and ruled the entire galaxy and that it would be named the Galactic Empire and I could have a bionic apprentice.

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Granted, but you die due to your incompetence to block a hole only 2 meters wide in a large fiery death!

I Wish i had more Cheese Nips!

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(Insert Witty or Philosophical Quote Here)

Granted: But that's already been done. Lucasfilms sues you for copyright infringement.
Edit: Curses, simulposted again.
Granted: You have more Cheese Nips. However, you realize that Cheeze-Its taste better. Wish = Very Wasted.

I wish I had a box of Cheerios.

Granted. You have too many and you die.

I wish I was not as cool as I am so people wouldn't be dieing for my autograph all the time. It hurts to know I'm the cause of all those people's deaths you know!

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Granted, but now you're the least cool person on earth, and people are still dying for your autograph because you hold the record for having the least amount of coolness.

I wish I was better at drawing.

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Granted: Unfortunately, you are now so uncool that people kill people for wanting your autographs.
Edit: CRAP! More simulposting!
Granted: You are better at drawing. You can now draw a smiley face on your stick figures. That's a great improvement from the faceless kind.

I wish I had a cup of juma juice(non-alcoholic variety).

Granted, but you fall in love with a drawing of a girl you made, and you waste your life with a piece of paper

I wish I had some Cheez-its then...

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(Insert Witty or Philosophical Quote Here)

Anywho, Granted: However, these cheeze-its belong to someone else. You get pummeled by Jello when you are in possession of a box signed J. B..

I wish I had a way out of this box.

Edit:Man, this thread is terrible about simulposting.

Already Happened...

Granted, but you find your way into another box.


I wish it didn't happen.

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Granted: Now you CAN'T draw smiley faces!

I still wish I had a way out of this box.

you find a way out, a hole into mid-air!

I wish I had a Demonic Scarf

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(Insert Witty or Philosophical Quote Here)

Granted, but its evil and decides to strangle you.


I wish i could talk like Bubs.

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Granted: Now you can talk like Bubs. However, now you can't talk like yourself. Now no one will believe it's you over the phone, including that guy who owes you 50 bucks.

I wish for a Top of the Page Dance!

You get a new [s]hat [/s] Top of the page dance but its big, pink and ugly so girls make fun of you

I wish I could break dance like a monkey

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(Insert Witty or Philosophical Quote Here)

Granted. But now people laugh at you when you talk. Your only option is to become a mime.

I wish I could challenge the evil Emperor of the Empire and go on an adventure involving Wookies and The Force.

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