Ruin a Wish

Strong Josh · **Posted:** Thu Mar 27, 2008 3:42 pm

Granted. Everybody is so fluent in English that people begin competing to see who can use the biggest words in everyday conversation. This conflict erupts into a nuclear war, and the fallout leads to nuclear winter. Everybody dies.

I wish my sinus problems would run away to China.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, your nose goes to china and you cant tast anything anymore
i wish i could play seek and destroy on the guitar

16_BIT_MARIO1 · **Posted:** Sat Mar 29, 2008 10:02 pm

Granted. Your guitar seeks you out and destroys you.

I wish I had an animation program on my computer.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, but then you get a whole bunch of computer viruses, like over 40000, viruses = very yes

i wish that my imagination wasnt broke

Dark Grapefruit · **Posted:** Mon Mar 31, 2008 3:33 am

Granted, now it runs completely perfectly. So perfectly in fact, that you will get an extraordinarily vivid mental image just from hearing certain words. Like, oh, say.... "SonicxShadow fanfiction." Enjoy!

I wish that kind of fanfiction didn't exist.

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted. However, there is no possible way to ruin this wish by twisting your words around to create irony. To appease the thread's blood thirst and/or humiliation craving, you become a recurring villain in several other types of Fanfictions who is repeatedly defeated by Mary Sues.

I wish I the Adoring Fan would stop following me.

Beyond the Grave · **Posted:** Mon Mar 31, 2008 4:55 am

Granted, he becomes you. Hey, at least he stopped following you.

I wish for free cheese.

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted: But to get it, you have to watch both of these videos in order.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jq9TnI7ssTU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uO2q6fxaxC0

I wish that I had an extremely sharp blade and wit with which to simultaneously fight and insult the pirates of Melee Island™.

gino · **Joined:** Mon Oct 08, 2007 1:40 pm **Posts:** 802

Granted, but, since you keep the blade above your bed while you sleep, it falls down, chopping your head off, so now your wit is useless.

I wish I knew if I would like World of Warcraft.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted but the game ceases to exist and no one remembers it, not even you
i wish i was better at hockey

Setsumi-san · **Posted:** Tue Apr 01, 2008 11:32 pm

Granted, but you're only better for two games.

I wish I was the most beautiful woman alive.

gino · **Joined:** Mon Oct 08, 2007 1:40 pm **Posts:** 802

Granted, but then you are hit by a meteor, making you an average-ly beautiful ghost.

I wish I could time travel.

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted, but you can only move forward through time at the same rate as everyone else.

I wish I had a better crossbow.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, but you kill yourself with it
i wish kurt cobain was still alive

silent wulf · **Posted:** Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:20 pm

granted but he runs out of ideas for songs and kills him self anyway

I wish my brother wasn't so anoying

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, your brother's not "so" anoying, new he's "extremly annoying"

i wish i could find that place i dreamed about

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted. Welcome to your worst nightmare. Population: You and countless terrible terrors.

I wish the person granting this wish was a facewich.

this-guy · **Posted:** Thu Apr 03, 2008 8:27 am

Granted. Your house blows up.

I wish that was the direction I wanted to go with this wish.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, but your head explodes
i wish for sounding stuff

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted: A Horn of Valhalla appears at your feet. You press it to your lips and blow as hard as you can. 4 Barbarians appear to do your bidding... Unfortunately, you didn't meet the prerequisites for this particular type of Valhalla Horn, so the Barbarians attack you.

I wish I had a Philosopher’s Stone.

Wesstarrunner · **Posted:** Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:03 pm

You flood the economy with gold and silver and it becomes worthless. You die lonely and alone.

I wish I had the most posts in this forum.

Somm-1 · **Joined:** Mon Feb 13, 2006 4:15 pm **Posts:** 2507

Granted: You somehow manage to post over 25,000 posts in a single day. StrongRad tries to ban you for breaking the world record for posting after yourself a large number of times, but Ramrod bans you first for making him look bad.

I wonder what this note on the ground says.
*reads it out loud*
"I wish I had a Sphere of Annihilation."
Why would someone write this down and leave it in the middle of the Ruin a Wish thr... Oh, crap.

Wesstarrunner · **Posted:** Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:54 pm

The Sphere of Annihilation is granted to you. While this is happening 10 small children are surrounding you. Once you get destroyed, the want to play with the ball. 9 of them are killed and one gains control and takes over the world.

I wish I was adored by all the ladies and not just most of them.

this-guy · **Posted:** Thu Apr 03, 2008 7:31 pm

Granted. Ladies never know when to stop!

I wish for a relevant ruin.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted... seriously
i wish that made sence

gino · **Joined:** Mon Oct 08, 2007 1:40 pm **Posts:** 802

Granted it made 3 cents

I wish I had a milkshake.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, but they used rotten milk
i wish i could uh... transform... into, some sorta... dragon

DumDeDum · **Posted:** Thu Apr 03, 2008 11:33 pm

Granted. You transform into a dragon, and get slain by a nearby knight.

I wish for eight onions.

High Skool Artist · **Joined:** Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:54 am **Posts:** 259

granted, but the kill you by making you cry untill you get too dehydrated to live
i wish i had some more money

this-guy · **Posted:** Fri Apr 04, 2008 12:09 am

Granted. You have 3 more cents.

I wish I had 3 cents.

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