Homestar Runner Wiki Forum

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee!

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"Why is there a fuse on my car?"

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"SAY 'ELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!"

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anyone here played Geist? some goys say this when they die, its so funny the way they say it.

"Ahh Crap!"

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"no, I don't have the drugs."

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No, I lied. I'm never going to have a good sig. So just forget about it.

Henry Thoreau's actual last words were "Moose......Indian."
This was freakin' hilarious at the time, because he was such a wise person and everybody tried to figure out what it meant after he died because he couldn't tell them anymore. But the answer is obvious. He was a big kidder. He was messing with people. I want my last words to be something like that. Here are some more.

Here is one emitted from Civil War General John Sedgwick, who, moments before being fatally shot in the head in the battle of Spotsylvania, said, "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." Granted, those aren't deep, but they're funny.

If you don't want to go with funny, you can go with poignant. The last words of Louise, Queen of Prussia (died in 1820) 's last words were "I am a Queen, but I have not the power to move my arms." Of course this would sound pretty stupid if you said this as your last words, and you were not, technically, a Queen, but you could adapt it to your specific situation, such as "I am the Cooterman Rental Backhoe Company's Regional manager for north and central Kentucky, yet I have not the power to move my arms." You should also consider with going with prank last words along these lines: "My only dying request is that you not make a big fuss over me after I'm gone. Just think of me sometimes. Also I want to be buried next to Elvis."

"I'm slipping away now. Everything is getting dark. Wait! I see a light ahead.....It's getting brighter...it's.....a Starbucks!"

"Please send word of my death to my other spouse and children in New Zealand."


"Before I go, there's something very important I must tell you all."

(Everybody leans in closer) "But first....Roo Roo!"

Of course these are just ideas, but you must plan ahead. You don't want your last words to be something like "Urg," or "Tell the nurse I have to make a number two." Is that what you want? Do you want your loved one's final memory of you - your lifetime, your career, your accomplishments - to involve a bowel movement?[/i]

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Beware of the Ides of March.

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"That shirt does make you look fat".

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Here till I get myself an image.

"Chuck Norris is a stupid weakling"

"Seems sturdy enough...."

"Can I pet it?"

"Whats it taste like?"

"Don't worry, I feel fine..."

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"Man, these Pop Rocks make me thirsty. I need some Coke."

I know this was disproved, but it is still funny.

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"oh, I hope do not press means press right away"

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Wow, It's been like three or 4 years since I've last been here

Some DnD/tabletop RPG-style famous last words,[s]stolen[/s] graciously borrowed from http://www.mutedfaith.com

"It's no big deal. Really."


"Do you have any magic items?"


"We can defeat anything!"


"Oh. Damn."


"Oh, that sucks for you guys."


"... attempt to disbelieve."


"I will bring defeat!"


"I'm attacking!"


"I'm running!"


"He's nothing."


"Nah, we won't take watch."


"I'm going to sleep."


"I thought HE had watch..!"


"Hm.. no good. Critical failure."


"I'm pushing open the sarcophagus."


"This is a bad call.."


"Ah, whatever. It doesn't matter."


"I'll leap across."


"No! No, I wasn't doing that!"


"No, really.. Really? Oh."


"I'm looking for anything that stands out.."


"You know, anything that might be 'special'."


"What do I see?"


"I'll use diplomacy.."


"I'm a god. A small, fuzzy god."


"He's not a threat, go for the dragon!"


"Oh, we're so screwed.."


"I'm rolling divine intervention.."

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get LOST

"Don't worry, it's hibernating!"


"I've done this, like, a million times."


"Stu's a wimp."Don't banninate me!


(walks aound corner) "Bob? Where are you? Stop fooling around, we're on sentry duty!"

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"HOLY CRAP!?! Aren't automatic guns illegal?!"

"That's not Trogdor, it's a cheap immitation, let's go poke it."

Or

"That's not Trogador, it's a cheap immitation, let's go ask it for a CHALEEEEEEEEENGE!"

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" Oooh! These fishes have teeth! Aww...Nice fishy! "

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I told you I wasn't feeling well...

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Former writer for WGN's Bozo Show 1993-96.

"Anybody seen my sandwich?"

"It's too dark to see much of anything down here..."

"We did it! We got through the storm! We're alive! ALIIIIIVE!"

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The meaning of life is 'bucket.'

FOR PONY!!!

This thread reminds me of my favorite Emo Phillips Quote.

"When in times of trouble, always remember my father's last words, 'A TRUCK!'."

"Mrs. Henderson, how do you divide by zero?"

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collect package; save adorable cat; you're really gullible.

"See? I told you it wouldn't blow up! See?! SEE--"

"I always had a suspicion that these things could be hostile. Just hold the leash really, really tight, OK? Now on the count of three, give 'im the medication. One... two... Hey, where are you going?"

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"Hay, is that Alberto?"

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"Mommy, what happens if you jump off a rollercoaster?"

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collect package; save adorable cat; you're really gullible.

"Ed is such a shrimp."

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"And everyone lived happily ever after..."
"...Until the giant ants came and slaughtered everyone."

"Someone stole my ipod."

First one to get the reference is an hero.

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" Of course their edible."
" I can't believe I ate the whole thing!"
" I don't Have your money STHU"
" You sure these are edible?"
" and you will pay me how much?"
" If I take ten times the dosage I will get better faster!"
" The totally can't here me no matter how loud I scream. watch!"

Those are mine.

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Generic Sig.

"Last words... Last words... Sir, I'm not quite sure what you mean by tha- What? Put on this blindfold? Okay, sure. Why's that guy counting? Is this a game? Ooh, a game! Four... three... two... one... BL-"

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So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell, blue skies from pain. Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil? Do you think you can tell?

RIP Mitchell.
He was an hero. D:

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collect package; save adorable cat; you're really gullible.

"The chances of that happening to us is one in a million!

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Toons! Games! Characters! Downloads! Store! Email!
If you order within the next 30 seconds, we'll also throw in a game where you download toons with characters in them, who buy things at the store via email!

"And. The. Bear. Walked. Into. The. House. And. Saw. Goldilocks. And. Devoured. Her. And. That's. Why. You. Don't. Mess. With. Texas-- OH MY IT'S A GIANT METEOR RUN FOR COVER"

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"I'll be out in a second."

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You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!