Homestar Runner Wiki Forum

(ah, calvin ball. the best sport.)

*dons regulation mask*

Very good, exept the field was rendered a "Real" zone by me tripping over the cable of numbers when i came on to the field, which means The Magnificent √-7 Team poofed out of existance, Eleventeen Team was not fizzed, and you must sing the "Reality song".

I have the calvin ball.

Well I'm the referee/secretary/treasurer/president/king and overall dominator of the world, and so I declare that everybody owes my five bucks and mew4ever23 gives me the calvinball. *brick'd*

_________________

Wait, The Reality Song? Greeeeaat. LET'S HAVE SOME SUPER SONG FUN KIDDIES!

(acoustic introduction)

Oh,
Sometimes you divide by numbers
And the answer is not real
Or you're surprised when you discover
Atomic bombs aren't made of orange peels
So what shall I do with this stockpile I made?
I was going to make Bangladesh look like an audiovisual aid
To the dangerous consequences of lending Russia money
McCarthy would be proud, and the rest would think it's funny

(Chorus)
Reality's important, because it makes sure
That the rest of the free world no longer must endure
Square roots of negatives or ketchup that's impure
I don't know what I'd do without it
Reality's essential, for when you bite into an orange,
That doubles as a foamy, quadrupedic door hinge
You'll know that it's not real, and wake up from your stupid dream
I don't know what I'd do without it

Occasionally you might see a trinket
Running for the discount price
Of 99 cents, so you think, it's
A ripoff, so it can't be nice
To tell the whole truth, I bought it anyway
A multifunctional coffee maker, but to my dismay
The thing only worked when it was on display
It must not have been real, the voices say

(Chorus)

(Bridge)
When you're walking on a bridge,
And it disappears beneath you
But you don't fall, you must be in a cartoon
Check your nametag - if it says a name
That Mel Blanc could have voiced
Either you're not in reality, or your parents are cruel

(Chorus X2)

(Outro)

WAS THAT FUN KIDDIES?

Also, I declare to be Emperor of the World. Aayugara, therefore, is my subordinate. Now he owes me 200 bucks for passing Go. So does everyone else. Chop, chop. NOT MY FINGER--

Ow.

_________________

Snork self-mutilated!! He gets the Emo penalty!! Meanwhile, I steal the Calvinball

_________________
(THE ABOVE USER HAS BEEN BANNED)

I didn't mutilate my own finger. Knifes fell from the sky. Chop, chop.

Uh-oh, you took the Calvinball while it was in the Ivanhoe sector. I hereby declare that we now shall use Olde English in our conversation. Starting in the next post.

_________________

(old timey english? tht's a tough one.)

I dash to wicket five, old bean, and aquire the "Roseta Flag". This alows me to type in whatever language i choose. *end ivahoe sector effects on me* i steal the calvin ball form netzen, who has entered the whirlpool zone. everytime he takes one step, he must spin around in a circle and go duck down a couple of centimeters lower than he started (bend your knees a little bit lower and lower each step). The Snork, incidently, gains 3000 Composer points for his "Realty song".

I doth sneaketh behindeth the rear of Mew Four Ever Two Three, esquire, and reclaimeth the Ball of Calvin, which I doth replace in its rightful restful home in the Church of Ball of Calvin, causing the chorus of angels to descendeth upon me and dub me "Current Leader" by bestowing upon me eighty-ballzillionty points. Eth.

_________________
You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

I runneth into the incredibly good luck zone, drinketh twenty and two metric tons of ye olde melonade, goeth to ye chamberpot, and acquireth the Rosetta Flag from Mew. Upon stealing the flag in the incredibly good luck zone, everyone may now speak in regular english and I acquire 2000 points. Since I acquired 2000 points in the incredibly good luck zone, I get an additional 2000 points and obtain the Calvin Ball!

_________________

I acquireth thine calvinball by means of a wooden stick and a fresh stick of chewing gum, and grabbeth the All-Eng flag, which shall resetteth all posts to normal!

Then I jump into the Transport Hole, emerge on the other side of the field, and run the Calvinball in to the beginningzone, scoring me F points!

The score is, of course, Q to 12.

_________________
You better believe it.

I accidentally stumble upon the dress-like-Colin-Mochrie-and-eat-a-potato zone.

Guess what, kiddies... It's Snack Fairy time, brought to you by Nabisco. Now with Potatoes In-a-Bag. It's 100 calories, we swear!

_________________

I climb into a tree and press a knot on its side. It's the Act Like The Person You're Dressed Like zone! Now you must perform improvisational comedy! While you're distracted with that, I take the Calvinball, even if you were using it for a game of Props!

_________________
You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

But I steal the ball, which means everybody gives all their points to me. Now I have to hide the ball and you guys have to post "I suck and I'm a loser" until you find it, and that includes the post by the person who finds it!

_________________
No, I lied. I'm never going to have a good sig. So just forget about it.

Sorry, but you said that rule from the bomerang zone, and thus, YOU must type "I suck and I'm a loser" in each post, we don't have to, until somebody finds the ball.

_________________
Please click "view" on all the dragons listed. Thanks a million.

Please visit my city as well.

Ha! I made you say "I suck and I'm a loser!"

_________________
No, I lied. I'm never going to have a good sig. So just forget about it.

Ha! you said that you suck and you are a loser!

Also, I entered the annoying-and-sorta-cheating zone, the next poster will not get the ball.

I may not get the ball, but I do find a shovel and dig pits on the field for you to fall into while I'm waiting to get the ball!

_________________
You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

I grab it out from in front of you and touch the "Sitting Tree" so you have to sit for 20 sec.s and let me get away!

_________________
You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!

You can't get away! You have to have been playing for at least a week. But you haven't, so you get the Bucket on Head of DOOM.

_________________

Uh Oh, you said the word DOOM in the video game hour! Now everything is in weird graphics, monsters from hell are invading, and we all get shotguns!

I shoot 3 zombies and a hellhound. 90Q points!

_________________
(THE ABOVE USER HAS BEEN BANNED)

I grab the Calvinball and shoot it out of my shotgun and steal your ammo!

_________________
You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!

That was the decoy Calvinball, the real one is over by the tree! I get a point!

_________________
Guten tag, Johann, du riechst ganz richtig. Danke schon, Heidi. Und du auch. - A Bit of Fry and Laurie

But what's this? OHNOES! There's a portalthere releasing some serious Cacodemons! I steal the ball while you're distracted and tag you with it! Now you have to yodel the "Not Even Doom Music" music!

_________________
You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

I swipe the ball while your laughing at him singing. I then tag you and you have to start singing with him. I make some popcorn and watch.

_________________
You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!

That is quite possibly the BEST SONG EVER WRITTEN. Now it just needs music. I WANT TO HEAR IT WITH MUSIC NOW. XD

_________________
So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell, blue skies from pain. Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil? Do you think you can tell?

I steal the calvinball from sbemailman and peg him with the Calvinball. i gain 230 iPoints and you must surrender your popcorn.

_________________
Please click "view" on all the dragons listed. Thanks a million.

Please visit my city as well.

While mew4ever is munching down the popcorn, I steal the Calvinball and push them into the pay-back zone, now they have to make me 2 buckets of popcorn for the one they stole.

_________________
You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!

*yodels*

Gaah! My vocal cords will have popped out by the end of this post, and fallen bereft to the ground! Everyone else's vocal cords will also do so in profound sympathy.

Luckily, you can still communicate using hand signals. *waves at sign saying "YOU ARE IN THE CHAUCER SECTOR"*

*writes down score as 37 to W*

_________________

I take the paper and turn it upside down.

Now it says: M ot LE

Which (for absolutely no reason) means I'm winning!!!

_________________
You're playing Team Fortess 2... you are a heavy and you have two medics... you are taking out everone on the other team so easy... another medic aproaches... THEN HE TURNS INTO A SPY AND STABS YOU IN THE SPINE!
SPY PWNS ALL!

I punch through the paper which means that you are no longer winning for no reason! Now nobody's winning!

Since Ian's vocal chords gave out in the Blame Sector, that means that everything that happens for the next five post's is Ian's fault! Also, since it's his fault we all can's speak, I hand-signal my declaration that Ian has to go inside and make chamomile tea with honey for all of us so we can get our voices back!

_________________
You look like you need a hug.
*hug*
There, now don't you feel better?

*pretends to know ASL and "says":*
It's Ian's fault that The Snork got confused for Ian Snorkus Maximus is now in the Land of Confusion, and can't get out until he references Phil Collins somehow.

*of course, that was really just a bunch of unintelligible hand-waving so no one has any idea what I said*

Since I'm flailing my hands around so wildly, you all have entered the Stan's Used Whatever Zone, and will be swayed by my hypnotic plaid jacket into giving me whatever you have so you can buy whatever I got! I have these lovely empty hot chocolate packet. Price: [s]YOUR SOUL[/s]whatever Calvinball-type equipment you happen to have. *Yoink!*

*is now sitting on a pile of random objects*

*wow that was quite the move*

_________________
ATTN: LOWER BOARD USERS HAVE MOVED TO ANOTHER FORUM. COME JOIN THE FUN!